My motherhood by Rachel

Like most things, motherhood is everything I thought it would be, and yet, nothing at all. The (my?) ultimate dichotomy between expectation and reality. The days are long but the years are short someone once told me. That about sums up my experience so far.

 

I didn’t expect to come face to face with my selfishness, my laziness and my lack of patience so brutally or abruptly. I thought I could just go on being me. Me with a baby. Turned out, I had to be stripped back and rebuilt from the bottom up.

 

To me, motherhood is a relationship. A challenging, changing but ultimately enormously rewarding relationship. It is not an achievement, for I feel an achievement is something you can only apply when you have finished. And I will never be finished being a mother. Motherhood has allowed me to feel deeply rooted to past and future generations of my family and in understanding myself and my daughter better,  I understand my own mother in a way I never did before.

 

Motherhood is learning. It is love. It’s communication without language and it’s the hardest thing I have ever done.

 

Rachel is mama to Pip, 19 months. She is a lawyer, writer and blogger. He blog is  The Little Pip.

The photo is by Cara of Bird & Bear

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